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Sephiroth ([personal profile] sefirot) wrote2020-04-24 05:44 am
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Only death awaits you all. But do not fear. For it is through death that a new spirit energy is born. Soon, you will live again as a part of me.
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realia: (3601498)

[personal profile] realia 2020-06-12 12:27 am (UTC)(link)
Cloud looks up as Sephiroth looks down and promptly looks away again, in a way that's almost like trying to soften your footsteps so as not to frighten away the birds pecking around on your lawn. If he focuses too hard on him, maybe he'll remember he's fucking crazy and start trying to kill him again. As much as he doesn't want to be suckered in by any bullshit about whatever joke of a life Sephiroth was living before he killed everyone he ever loved, this is... preferable to the alternative. Maybe? Whatever, he's getting exhausted of going in circles with it in his head.

"Is that why you wanted to leave? Because of what happened to them? ...It makes sense," he adds, tacked on at the end there. Who wouldn't want to leave, after seeing something like that happening to their friends? As absurd as it is in his mind to think of Sephiroth ever having friends. He was a person once, too, he guesses.
realia: (3601498 (31))

[personal profile] realia 2020-06-12 01:35 am (UTC)(link)
Genesis... Cloud frowns, thinking back. Way back. Somewhere in the muddy, hazy, fucked up mess that are still his memories even after he got his head back on straight, he can kind of remember—Zack talking to someone, a cave...? Feathers. Ugh—blast from the past. It makes his head hurt just a little bit. He doesn't often get those headaches anymore, but here we are. His eyes squint against the twinge of an ache at his temple and casts the thought aside. Probably better if he tries not to think too hard on it.

"In the end, neither of you were. Nobody was."

Nobody came out of that a winner. Not Sephiroth or any of his friends, not Zack, not even him. But you could say that about their whole story, couldn't you? Nobody really won. The Planet had to restore its own damn self. It's still... what did Barret call it once? A sick, scared kid. And everybody left standing is still living on it, just trying to get by.
realia: (3601498 (3))

[personal profile] realia 2020-06-12 03:23 pm (UTC)(link)
Is that... yeah, that kind of sounds vaguely familiar, actually. Not that particular passage, but the... verbiage. Listen, he's not into poetry, and the synopsis he got of Loveless back when he was a grunt and had time to dick around in Sector 8 sounded fuckin' lame (or so all the other guys said, so he just went with it). But hearing Sephiroth recite it—

Uh, wow.

Thing is, he might smirk (that's as close as he'll get to a laugh) at how absurd it is, but he's struck by another thought. And that thought is that Sephiroth is... really going in on this. Talking about his friends. Quoting their dumb poems. Remembering them as people and not just, y'know, insects on this planet he thinks he's the boss of, that kind of thing. Cloud's gaze drifts back up to Sephiroth's face, a little... confused. "It must've really stuck with you," he says after a pause, "if you still remember it after all this time."
realia: (3601498 (63))

[personal profile] realia 2020-06-13 03:27 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, this is... kind of freaking him out. It just clashes so much with the way he prefers to keep Sephiroth in his head—a monster, no longer human, without human impulses or feelings. He might've had people he cared about once, long ago, but that's all been cast off, hasn't it? He's got to wonder, listening to him talk now. In fact, the trouble isn't even that he has to wonder. The answer speaks for itself—that might not be as true as he thought after all. Maybe it's just that he... lost those pieces of himself. The way he had—

Ugh! No! The last thing he wants is to relate to him... ugh. Cloud frowns all over again, tying off that bandage and taping it in place with the rest. He smooths it down with his fingers, brow furrowed. Comes back with a little more sarcasm than strictly necessary, defensive of his own thoughts. "You've never heard of a mirror?"
realia: (3601498 (36))

[personal profile] realia 2020-06-13 04:23 am (UTC)(link)
"Tch," Cloud helpfully responds. Then, abruptly, he gets up and leaves the room again. This is honestly stupid, but you know? It gives him an excuse to not have to touch Sephiroth anymore, or... stare awkwardly at him while he becomes painfully aware of his emotions and whatever other human qualities he evidently possesses. Also, maybe he's making fun of him a little, still.

When he returns, it's with a hand mirror. Mind you, he's not sure Sephiroth is going to be fond of his face in the state it's in now, with those... ah. Oh. Now he understands what the marks on his face are supposed to be. Whatever, he's not thinking about it right now. He just frowns and thrusts the mirror out to him, reflective side out. "Knock yourself out."
realia: (3601498 (41))

[personal profile] realia 2020-06-13 09:36 pm (UTC)(link)
That's about what he expected. Maybe not the best idea? But oh well, too late now. Cloud just sighs as Sephiroth tosses the mirror down and sits back where he was. Maybe not quite as physically close, rummaging around in the first aid kit until he finds some adhesive bandages. He'll have to cut them to fit, and it's not going to make the scars go away, but at least it'll cover them? Whatever, it's all he's got. Take it or leave it. He starts unwrapping them and trimming them to size with the miniature pair of scissors included.

"It's your own damn fault," he mutters. What great bedside manner. "The Turks are tight-knit. You should've known better than to piss them off. You'll have the whole rest of the rat-pack on your ass now."

He doesn't say it like it's any sort of actual threat; in fact, he sounds kind of regretful about it. They're all going to get themselves killed, and he doesn't think he can do anything to put a stop to it. It's... already too late.
realia: (3601498 (26))

[personal profile] realia 2020-06-14 12:54 am (UTC)(link)
"I'm not in the mood for your excuses. It was the wrong thing to do. Not that you're capable of doing anything but."

Reno wasn't a friend, and Tseng absolutely wasn't either, but he's still not happy about it. They were working to make things right, for... better or worse, as far as Shinra Inc is concerned, and they were a big help with the remnants. Not to mention he has nothing but impatience for Sephiroth murdering anyone.

For the millionth time, he's pissed off that he's helping him now. Nostrils flaring, he looks up. Reaches to push Sephiroth's hair back from his face, then sticks the bandage he's cut smaller overtop of the crescent under his left eye. It's not much, but at least it covers the mark. The downside is he's left frowning and looking Sephiroth straight in the eye again, when he'd really rather not.

"You don't have to be like this, you know."
realia: (3601498 (76))

[personal profile] realia 2020-06-14 01:36 am (UTC)(link)
"You could try not being one," Cloud answers, laden with sarcasm. And yet... not. Not sarcastic at all. What does he want? That'd be a start, at the very least. Try not fucking murdering everyone you come into contact with. He shakes his head at himself, sighing. It's a waste of his breath. There's no chance in a million years he'd get his hopes up that he'd ever get through to Sephiroth, but he's got nothing else to do but say it anyway.

Reaching for the other bandage, he does the same for the crescent carved under his right eye. Poetic justice. He doesn't agree with Tseng's methods here, either, but at least he understands what he was going for. And now it's all covered up, and Cloud feels like he's making an ass of himself, tucking Sephiroth's hair behind his ear so he can slap that second bandage on. And... what, try to convince him not to be evil?

Stupid.

"There's more to life than being pissed off about what happened to you all the time. I would know."
realia: (3601498 (15))

[personal profile] realia 2020-06-14 01:59 am (UTC)(link)
"I'm pissed off at you. The rest..."

Well, alright. He's no saint, he hasn't let it all go. But he's trying to, and that's a start. Forgiveness, right? Being forgiven, forgiving others... he said he was going to try. It's not something he's going to be any good at in just a day. Or however many days it's been.

Haltingly, Cloud takes his hand from Sephiroth's face. That's about all he can do for him, at least for right now. He wonders if Aerith would approve. Or Zack. Would they... surely they would, right? After a moment he drops that thought and picks up a new one, instead, looking up.

"You ever try forgiveness?"

Wow. That's the stupidest fucking thing he's ever said. He might as well have asked Sephiroth if he's ever smoked weed. Fuck this. He shakes his head.

"Never mind. Forget it."
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[personal profile] realia 2020-06-14 02:29 am (UTC)(link)
Well... then, that answers that. He's not sure specifically which what I've done Sephiroth is referring to, or if it was just everything. But Zack would have that down to a mastered skill, wouldn't he? Forgiving someone like Sephiroth, in spite of everything. Cloud wishes he could be like him, just like he always had, but it's not that simple. They aren't the same people. And what they went through wasn't the same, either. Zack didn't watch his home burn, his mother beg for her life, he didn't see Aerith get cut down. And—ugh, everything else. It's easy for Zack to say. Not so much for him.

Sephiroth's question makes Cloud even quieter still. What made Sephiroth the way he is... even he can't comment on it fully. There's only so much he truly understands about what went wrong with him. Part of that is because he never wanted to understand. He just wanted someone to answer for what happened to his home. "Maybe it isn't who so much as what. It isn't just Shinra, and what they did... it's everything."

Gee. How helpful.

"Sorry. That's... pretty broad, I guess."
realia: (3601498 (21))

[personal profile] realia 2020-06-14 02:58 am (UTC)(link)
"I don't think that's entirely true."

The part about his mother, but god forbid he go there. They're already on such tenuous terms here, if they get into it it'll just be a damn mess. Then again, maybe that's what he wants, actually. Just pick a fight, draw swords, get this over with. Except—Sephiroth is in no state to fight him. It'd hardly be a battle, and he'd just wind up running him off. Right back to Zack, maybe? Or into hiding while he recovers, where he'll be like a sick, cornered animal, likely to lash out. Or maybe a sitting duck for the rest of the Turks.

Ugh. No option is a good option. Except for the one where everyone and everything just stops doing anything stupid and he gets to be left alone in peace like he wanted. Which will never happen.

"Jenova's only the half of it. The rest is wanting to be strong. You did the things you did because you felt them."
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[personal profile] realia 2020-06-14 03:27 am (UTC)(link)
Cloud answers that with a vague mm, almost as if he agrees. Yeah, he... wanted to be something like that, too. And it was largely because of Sephiroth. Now he knows he's not the only one, and all that time he spent feeling different and special—honestly, he ain't shit and never was. Or that's how he sees himself. What ended up happening, the destiny he got swept up in, wasn't it more a case of wrong place, wrong time? Whatever, does it even matter anymore?

"I... had to forgive myself." He'd rather not tell Sephiroth about this. But he's goaded him into saying plenty this evening, so maybe it's fair play. And besides, he has a point. He's going somewhere with this, and it's not about him. He's just awkward about getting there. "I don't know—I can't tell you what to think or how to feel. We're not the same."

God he fucking hopes not.

"But maybe you do, too." Awkward pause. God, it sounds stupid. He thinks everything he says sounds kinda stupid, though. "Just a suggestion."

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